When people ask, “So… what do you do all day?” sometimes it’s an innocent attempt to connect—but more often, it’s judgment.
It’s not really about your schedule. It’s about your status.
It’s Darwinism in pearls. A Rorschach test for your bank account.
One of the biggest signifiers of wealth is leisure—not having to work.
But are you rich… or are you just unemployed?
The implication is clear: if you’re not hustling, monetizing, or otherwise stressed out, are you even living?
Which is why your response to this not-so-innocent question is absolutely crucial.
So, when someone leans over the dinner table and says, “What do you do all day?” you could be polite:
- “I keep the wheels turning behind the scenes.”
- “I mostly volunteer.”
- “Oh, you know—life fills in the blanks, doesn’t it?”
- “Dogs and horses, mostly.”
But if they’re looking for a lazy degenerate—give them exactly that. Give them something so unhinged they’ll still be thinking about it weeks later.
“What do I do all day? Well, mornings are for crying. But after eleven, when I’ve had my first drink, I take the Savannah cats for a stroll—they’re twins. Then I organize the family silver based on which cousin has slighted me and deserves it the least. There’s always some crisis management—the Irish Wolfhound is perpetually in litigation. You know how they are. The koi must be supervised at feeding time. Once a week, I host a salon for women who’ve mysteriously outlived more than three husbands. I have a standing lunch date with a woman who might be my half-sister, but we don’t discuss it because it’s awkward. I’m having a torrid affair with my dressage trainer—don’t tell anyone. Oh, and I consult in my free time. You don’t need my services yet… but when you do, you’ll know. Also, we have a family curse, so I spend daylight hours trying not to inherit it. After that—just like you—Pilates. How about you? What do you get up to?”
It’s not just an answer—it’s a conversation ender, a myth-builder, and a delightful way to make them question everything they thought they knew about you.
Anyway, darling…I hope this helped.